An Open Letter to My Latest Date, Part II

At least your apartment was clean; I’ll give you that. I’m not a fan of going back to guys’ apartments. I’d much rather bring a guy back to my place and be in my own environment (read: control freak) than risk the unknown (and likely visible pubes in the bathroom) in his.

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An Open Letter to My Latest Date

Dear ____ (you know who you are),

First off, starting a dinner date with a story about a condom slipping off and taking the girl to get Plan B is not a good opening anecdote, regardless of the fact that you told the story in the context of Aziz Ansari’s Netflix series, “Master of None.” You brought up Aziz and immediately segued into your uncomfortable story.

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Date Like a Dog

When you think about dogs and dating, you probably think of phrases like “All men are dogs.” But I’m not about to bash men, or dogs. First off, why do we call bad behavior acting like a dog? This is as much of a misnomer as using “pussy” as a term for weakness, as in “Stop acting like a pussy.” Dogs are loyal, sweet and dependable. Which brings me to my revelation.

Lokum

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The Fuck and Forget

My parents raised me sex positive long before “sex positive” was a term.

My mom told me that “making love is a beautiful act between people who are in love.” My parents didn’t hide that sex was pleasurable; in fact, my mom used to say, “Why do people say ‘fuck you?’ They should say ‘unfuck you’ because fucking feels good.”

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